


You look at me like I'm the only boy around

by katnor



Category: Yuri!!! on Ice (Anime)
Genre: Brad the Doorman, Established Relationship, Jealous Victor Nikiforov, M/M, Oblivious Heartbreaker Katsuki Yuuri, Oblivious Katsuki Yuuri, Or was it Chad?, Protective Yuri Plisetsky
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-11-15
Updated: 2018-11-15
Packaged: 2019-08-24 04:42:07
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 804
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16633142
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/katnor/pseuds/katnor
Summary: Yuuri doesn't notice people flirting with him - at all. Nope. They're probably looking at Viktor, after all, his fiancé is extremely handsome. Phichit knows better, and has stories to tell, about Chads'n'Brads and nosebleeds.





	You look at me like I'm the only boy around

“He really has no idea?”

“Not a clue. What’s worse, he’s not stupid or anything. Quite the opposite. He’s just convinced no one would look twice at him.”

“You mean he never noticed people walking into lamp-posts when they look at him? Never took a minute to wonder why some people develop a stutter when they try to talk to him, but not when they talk to anybody else?”

“It never occurs to him that people might find him attractive, and he’s utterly _clueless_ when it comes to someone flirting with him. You’d have to tell him in very simple terms that you think he’s beautiful and you’d like to take him out on a date, and not even being blunt always works.”

Sara and Mila listened in fascination as Phichit wove stories about his gorgeous, oblivious roommate. Like the time he made the barista at their favourite coffee shop cry, because after he’d written his phone number on Yuuri’s coffee cup, Yuuri forgot the cup _and_ his coffee just to rush outside to pet a cute dog. Or the trio of young women who came to every rink practice and one of them got a nosebleed (for real!) when the knot on Yuuri’s shoelace slipped and he had to retie it. That was, incidentally, the same time a couple of the guys from the hockey team collided as they were getting off the ice. Their coach yelled at them for not watching where they were going, and then for not listening when he was chewing them out. Phichit claimed to have heard one of them mumbling something about not knowing if he was in heaven because god, that _ass_ , or in hell because he could only look, not touch. 

The doorman at their favourite club in Detroit despaired after checking Yuuri’s ID once (to find out his name), letting him and Phichit in past the line outside the door several times (Yuuri thought he had a crush on Phichit) and finally offering to drive him home after a night out. Yuuri insisted on getting a taxi, and apologetically told Chad the doorman (or was it Brad?) that Phichit wouldn’t be coming home with him, so he shouldn’t bother himself driving Yuuri home. “Better luck next time, I think he’s really warming up to you”, he said in a tone full of sympathy. Brad the doorman (or Chad) gave up all hope at that point and decided celibacy was probably his destiny.

“So how did Viktor manage to get through to him?” Sara’s eyes lit up with curiosity. 

“He got through because he’s Viktor, and because he’s just as dense as Yuuri in his own way. He just charged in, told Yuuri he was the most beautiful man on the planet, and then he told everyone else as well. He gushes, he swoons over Yuuri, he’s so totally besotted it’s painful, and it’s exactly what Yuuri needs. He still doesn’t believe in his own attractiveness, but he believes that _Viktor_ believes, and that seems to be enough for him.”

“Look, there they are now!”, Mila whispered excitedly. Viktor and Yuuri had entered the restaurant, both in dark, well-cut suits and matching pink ties. Yuuri laughed at something his fiancé said, and the head waiter, who was leading them to where the other skaters were waiting, tripped over his own feet and nearly faceplanted into a table. Yuuri made sure he was fine, while Viktor sent the poor man a rather icy glare. 

Once they were seated, Yuuri gave Viktor an accusing look: “Vitya, there’s no need to be so nasty, the man can’t help it! You’re just too handsome, of course he’s smitten!” There was an awkward silence at the table, then Mila and Leo started talking at once. Viktor looked even more infatuated than usual, and leaned over towards Phichit to whisper:

“Isn’t he just the most oblivious, cinnamon roll-y sexpot you ever saw? He just has no idea…” His smile was giddy, and Yurio pretended to retch on his side of the table. The head waiter and his two female colleagues were watching from a distance, the women cooing over the way Viktor took Yuuri’s hand and kissed his fingertips one by one. He looked up and gave Yuuri’s poor admirer a glance that promised a slow, torturous death if he even came close. 

They were served by two waitresses who sighed in rapture over Viktor’s romantic gestures towards his fiancé, grew starry-eyed over Yuuri’s adorable blush and smiled benignly at Yurio and his minor explosion over not being allowed vodka with his food. The head waiter was nowhere to be seen, although Phichit had his suspicions. He’d heard Yurio whisper something about Russia and mafia to the hapless man. He would have hidden in a broom closet too, in his place.

**Author's Note:**

> Oblivious!Yuuri and Oblivious heartbreaker!Yuuri is my absolute favourite. That's why.


End file.
